Waldon here, and the smell of my hot chocolate is driving me crazy, but I don't want to get another one cause I'd wake up the house. XD

Anyway, for my first post since getting out for March break and Weebly letting me log back in, I'll finally do a post that I've been thinking about for a day or so; Music.

I'm branching out guys. I NEVER talk about music.

(Apologies in advance, I doubt this is very coherent. I didn't exactly plan it out before writing it.)

I was listening to Breaking Benjamin the other day, and I realized something about the genre of metal that linked it to classical; even to things like folk and spiritual music. You see, heavier rock or any of the sub-genres of metal (That's really vague, but believe me, there are hundreds of ways I could classify this. I'll just use these two categories.) ARE passive music. You can sit down and listen to it while working or relaxing, but it's also involved in the active mind processes. It is thought provoking and stimulating. It will give you ideas that you've never had before, or create mental channels that you've never used. Because you have to TRY to hear it.

When I'm listening to metal or heavier rock where others can hear it, numerous times, I've been told that it's not really music, or that it's just senseless noise. It's not senseless at all. It's HEAVY. That's the point of the message of that particular song. It's when the emotion is so strong in a piece that the singer has to yell it out. That song has to get out; it has to get out, or the emotion is gone. The genre is almost pure, if you look at it that way. But that isn't the point that I'm trying to get across here.

What I'm trying to say (albeit in a roundabout, convoluted way) is that you need to actively LISTEN to the heavier genres. You need to concentrate on the song itself and filter out the "noise" about it, so that the vocals are clear to you, so you can distinguish between the individual instruments and listen to the song itself; how they all fit together.

Now, I know at least one person reading this is going to wonder; where do genres like Classical come into this?

Simply put, classical music is open to interpretation as well. As is Folk, Trance, Spiritual music and all the other non-canon (I do not believe canon is the word I'm looking for, but alas.) musical genres that are considered weird by a majority of the population.

This is because a good portion of what ends up being mainstream music, or the music that the average person listens to, is passive. It allows you to just turn it on, and let the words and beat, rhythm and meaning come to you and influence you. It tells a story or presses an ideal forward that we can readily agree with, whilst that message may not even be what the artist intended, because we've all decided to make the song mean what we want it to mean.

People, en masse, do not want to have to work to hear a song or have to focus to understand a message. Music for most people is for relaxing. They listen to music to hear bands or artists that they relate to "talk" to them. People want to feel like they're listening to a friend. They want to turn on the radio or iTunes or browse youtube and listen to things that aren't harsh or directly related to themselves, and I completely understand that.

Think about when you listen to a song and the vocals aren't clear. Now, I want you to think about how often you subconsciously dismiss something that's just gibberish or pointless rambling? That's because we process all of those things on the same mental level; white noise.

If I may step back to a previous point; people say metal or heavy rock is just noise, and I personally I hear the most objections about metal or heavy rock that have to deal with how the words of the song are all just growling or too jumbled to hear. "White noise."

When I started listening to metal and heavy rock, I couldn't tell what the vocalists were saying. I didn't have a CLUE. But, I kept listening to it. I wanted to know what they were saying, I wanted to know what they were trying to tell me. Slowly, I began to actually hear the song itself and not just some amalgamation of cacophony (That would make an awesome band name, btw) that's blaring from my speakers.

And I slowly began to enjoy more, and more of the genre. I noticed that bands that I thought were just yelling at me, were actually just angry; angry at themselves, at the world, at the unfortunate things that happened to them. And then I noticed that people expanded that again, they made the genre into it's own breeding ground. Comedy, drama, serious musical compositions. It was all there. It was just under the surface of that harsh exterior.

Similar to the wordlessness of classical or trance, wouldn't you say? It's almost impossible to tell what the maestro is trying to tell you, exactly what the composer was trying to say, even though the sounds are clear and concise. Classical and trance music are the equivalent of images without pictures. You paint your own, you create an image from the sounds you're given. It's similar to hearing a soundtrack to a well loved movie; you can see the actors going about their assigned roles.

Since starting to listen to metal and the harder rock, I've found myself liking more and more of the other types of music. Including hip-hop, rap, blues, jazz, trance, electronic, folk, acoustic and classical. I started to really listen, and I guess I just couldn't stop.

The genres of metal and hard rock make you start to think. They make you sit down and process their music. It creates a fandom within itself. You feel more personally connected to the song. Like listening to a well loved soundtrack... right? It makes you actually hear what the band or artist is trying to say, because if you don't actually LISTEN to them you won't even hear the song. It'll just be noise. It makes you think and process... and if you listen to the music and say you love it just because it's harsh and you're an angry individual, all the power to you.

But you're not really listening, if you're making a generalization like that, are you?

Now, I may have just made a few people irritated with me after hearing that, but I want you to look up two songs by Breaking Benjamin, and one by the universally loved Eric Clapton.

Layla [Unplugged] - Eric Clapton
Rain - Breaking Benjamin
I Will Not Bow - Breaking Benjamin

You'll notice that Layla [Unplugged] and Rain sound fairly tame, don't they? They sound like something relaxing, pretty, even. But I Will Not Bow? I bet a bunch of you didn't enjoy it, even though it was by the same thought provoking artist that made Rain. Within metal and hard rock, it isn't all just "yelling" and sacrilegious intent. Is music about the sound, or the message? That's entirely up to you, of course. After several years of listening to metal and heavier rock, I don't even need to try to filter them anymore, the words are clear to me. Musical preference is subjective, and I'd guess that a good portion of people if they ever read this, just dislike metal and hard rock just because. But if you've read this far, then I guess you're of a similar mind to my own, and I implore you and everybody around you...

Listen.

Just please. Sit down, and actually listen to the song. Listen to the sound of the song, and how it influences you. Listen to the words being said, and how they change your mindset. Listen to them both, together. Listen to the actual song.

Don't just dismiss metal and hard rock as pointless noise. It's a message, and a message left unheard can only hurt you, in the end.

Every thought you have that you've never had before, will enrich you.

Thank you all for listening to me.
-Waldon

Waldon here, and I'd like to offer my sincerest apologies, I forgot the blog last night, and there was no good reason why. I'm so, so sorry.

First things first, the title. The epic title above was performed by Manowar, it's a song called "Heart of Steel". Their music is absolutely astounding, very inspiring. All about strength of character and your own convictions. What good is a belief if you're unwilling to stand up for it? If you're not convinced that what you believe in is right, why do it? They preach companionship and bonds between people. I've never met such a close knit group of people as metalheads. Sure, they all have tastes and likes, but I've noticed that where most raves and dance halls play techno and hiphop, that it lets people get lost in anonymity in the crowds and lights. But at rock performances, metal halls, thrash and mosh pits, the crowds love each other. Mostly.

In a mosh pit, it seems like it's mindless violence, but as soon as the thrash is over, the wall of death is broken on itself, the very people that knocked you over and broke your nose will be the people to help you up, give you a towel and hold you up to rock out some more to the sound.

If that isn't camaraderie, I don't know what is. :P

On the topic of music, today I listened to "Personal Jesus" as done by Johnny Cash. Great song, in all of its incarnations. But it got me thinking about what people think of God. So many people are too eager to say outright that God is fake. There is no God. There's too much suffering for God to exist if he really loved us.

Why can't you see God? To me, God isn't some all powerful figure, but an idea.

In my own eyes there's proof of God all around us. God is in everything. God is the sun shining bright every morning, God is the dew that falls off the cool willow leaves after dawn, God is the bright flowers that open in the noon luminescence, God is the cool shade beneath the trees in the sweltering afternoon, God is the sound of frogsong at dusk, and God is even the lazy sounds of a summer evening after a long day.

"How is that? Where is God, exactly? Everything is made of atom's deep down. We'd know if he was there, we've seen it all. You're wrong."

But to me, that isn't God. God is our faith. God is our belief in a higher entity than ourselves. We all, if I may use this without undue complications, have our own personal Jesus. Maybe you don't believe in Christianity, but you're a follower of Buddhism, or you're a Taoist or Voudoun, even Unitarian or Sikh. Heck, even if you don't believe in any particular entity at all, but in the souls of mankind or in reincarnation, you have your own God.

Now, let me clarify something. I am not per se, a Christian of faith. I'm of no particular religious affiliation. I just believe in what makes sense to me. My God, is everything.

God doesn't have to be some all powerful, omniscient being, despite how the term is classified.

God is faith. God is us. We give the term power by believing in it. So many of us want some guidance in life that we go to various religions looking for direction. This belief in something, anything, is all we want.

What is God? God is what we believe in, what our faith defines. Scientology completely abuses any religious interference in our lives at all, stating that it's ignorant or unimportant to the world as a whole, that we could do away with religion and the problems it causes by adhering to science instead. What does that leave us to believe in? Humanity as a whole needs something to believe in, to live for. Anybody who believes in a God, any God or Gods at all... These people would be completely redundant for a Scientologist to preach to. Why? Because they have conviction. They have faith in their belief. If you believe something you're not going to change your mind because somebody else says that it's stupid. That isn't faith. And God, my friends, is faith.

Your own personal Jesus can be anything. It's something you have faith in. Whether that be a friend on the other side of the phone line, or a symbol in a sacred church that you pray to when your troubles are weighing you down. It's what listens to you, and you know it listens to you completely and understands you.

I know, I still haven't answered the question of why there's suffering in the world if there is God, but I'll do that now.

Because if God solved our problems for us, where would we be as Humanity? Would we have evolved to the point we have today if we didn't have to try to better ourselves? I know what it's like to experience loss, but I can't bring myself to resent God for that loss. I believe that God is everything. God is an idea of perfection that is in everything that we need to try to reach. Something similar to Heaven or Nirvana, if I may say so.

We develop as a species by depending on one another. If we stopped and appreciated what's around us more often, looked and saw God, if I may say so, maybe we wouldn't be so quick to jeer or attack beliefs and individuals.

Now, back to Manowar, they preach about standing strong with your ideals. That is what anybody who believes in something should do. They should stand strong with their ideals in the face of public ridicule, but... Don't be ignorant.

So many people assume that it's okay to make fun or humiliate other groups for what they believe in when it differs from what they believe. I'm not saying that. I'm saying that we should all be respectful of the beliefs in the world. We're all looking for guidance. I've found my inner peace and I hope you all can too. Please people, think about what I've said here. Everybody has their own Personal Jesus, their own Buddha or Ganeesh, or any other God or personal figure they rely on when they're feeling vulnerable or sad, faith is the cornerstone of existence.

So let the world believe what they want to believe, and appreciate the world around us while we have it. The end of our lives could be in 90 years, or a few hours, let your own inner peace find you without fear before you go. God is real my friends, and although you may not believe in God the all mighty, God is everywhere, and hopefully you all appreciate that. Let peace follow your footsteps in life, and let your fellow man and woman appreciate your own God and existence with you.

Come see me sometime, I'll try to show you how I See.

Good night all, hopefully I've given you something to think about. :)
-Waldon

Ah, oui. Hot dogs. How I hate them. Naturally, every Tuesday, in the canteen, that’s exactly what we have to make. Hot dogs. Subs and sandwiches? I can sell that. Soup and chili? Love the stuff. Now, hot dogs, on the other hand, I can’t stand. There’s just something about eating them that just grosses me out. The fact that I don’t know what is put in them is a scary one. Beef and/or pork and/or chicken and/or platypus. Nope, that’s not going to fly with me. I like knowing what I eat! Like berries! Love them! Anywho… That isn’t my story. I was going to explain the title.

Today, at the canteen, we served hot dogs. As usual, the junior high students were a bunch of savages and crowded the canteen window. We’re lucky that many of them are polite. Not all, mind you, but many. Maybe not even half… But many. At one point during lunch, Deejay had to put more hot dogs on because we had run out and would need more. Ms. Edmunds came up in that time and asked if she could buy a couple and have them delivered to her in the junior high wing where she was on duty. We laughed, and I agreed to go down with them when they were ready. Five minutes later, I brought them down to her. She was so pumped! I absolutely loved it. Ms. Edmunds is amazing. Today in Religion class, we were talking about a crazy elite school in Halifax, Nova Scotia that had an incredible curriculum (shall I say?). Their art program was great, they put a great deal of focus on academics, and every morning, they meditate before they start their day. Now, this DOES have something to do with Religion. It is the Shambhala School (something to do with Buddhism, but, unfortunately, I can’t remember what!). Look it up on Google. The tuition is a decent price, too, for what students get from their time there.

I haven’t really done much today. Religion, Pre-Cal, Math, Canteen, French, Chemistry. I did my homework after school… I had supper at Nan and Pop’s… I picked Mom up from work… Aaahhh… I made really crappy cookies about an hour and a half ago. Jeepers, they’re bad. I used too much butter. That’s actually a funny thought because I had run out of butter and I hadn’t used enough, so I had to run to the store. Went to the store, got the butter, came home, used too much. Gosh. Not my night. Oh well. I’m sure SOMEONE will like them?

ACK! I forgot an important part of my day! GASP. Okay. While looking around for flour, I cut myself on the saran wrap cutter. We have one on the underside of the cabinet, so when I reached in to get the jar of flour, my hand grazed the sharp edge and cut me. It hurt SO bad! I should have put some Polysporin on it… Oh well. I’ll survive… I hope. (O-o)

Before I fall asleep on my keyboard, I’m going to bed.  Oh, p.s. This is usually posted after 5 pm Atlantic time, or 4 hours before London, England (ex. 5pm here, 9pm in London). Just throwing that out there. Good night!

-Bre :)

Waldon here, and I'd like to take a minute to reflect on how I view Christmas. I'd like to point out, right from the start, that I don't view Christmas as a commercial holiday, I think of it as a state of mind.

 If we stopped viewing Christmas as the time of the year that we buy presents for people, and start thinking of it as the time of the year that we can spread some love and joy, I think more people would see the day as I do. Maybe I should explain it with an example. . .

This Christmas, my uncle was put into Rehab for alcohol addiction. He could hardly function. His life was falling down around his ears. We had to make an intervention. Within a few weeks, he had been flown out to the economic sector of our province to get help. Obviously he couldn't work while he was in rehab, so he lost money for food and housing. We all had to pitch in and get him applied for grants and services. This was the 3rd time we had to step in like this, we were all worried.

When Christmas came around, he was home with us, he was laughing and jolly. He was with his children whom wouldn't talk to him for years because of his problems. But he got gifts from all of his family, he received money, food, clothing, photos, everything he needed. He's not done getting himself fixed and back into shape. . . but I think that he knowing that his family was there for him, his friends as well, will help him, strengthen his steps so to speak, to finally reach the goal of abstinence from alcohol.

So what is Christmas? Christmas is a time for us all to forget our troubles and worries. To hold out our arms to each other and maybe sing a little? :P

Maybe what I'm just trying to say, is that we could all take a step back from what we thought we were doing with the Holiday, and see it for what it SHOULD be. Cheer and love, not money and gratification, yeah?

I think I'm rambling. Am I rambling? Oh well. This is your almost compulsory "Christmas-is-Love" seminar from myself. xD But unlike the other blogs out there, I mean it. :P

Good night everybody, I hope your Christmas was as good as mine!
-Waldon

Waldon here, and I'm in a particularly philosophic mood. But before I get into my rant and thesis, I would like to, nay, I would love to congratulate Bre. Today, Bre did her road test for her driver's license and, of course, passed! Congratulations Bre! We were all rooting for you and as a British guy who was getting drunk in my shed once said to me, "May you have many happy miles . . ." Of course, he was talking about a motorcycle in regards to myself (and a pathfinder is much different than a motorcycle) but the principle and meaning is the same, yeah?

So anyways, I was thinking tonight, about the many facets of the human soul. Of what makes us human to each other. What it is that creates a sense of oneness when we look at another of ourselves.

Deep in our collective mind, we claim that we are human when we can recognize ourselves as of the same family and genus. But what is it, really?Is a human just an evolved ape?

Or is a human somebody that has emotions and feelings, a right to speak and converse? A mind and soul, a part of the whole that is our world?

I believe so. We would not be human without our mind that can rationalize and justify, that relies on gut instinct to lead us through our troubles. We would not be human if we cannot love or hate, or fear or lust for another. A human, to myself, is somebody that can empathize with another and feel pain. "Therefore, send not to know For whom the bell tolls, It tolls for thee." said by English poet, John Donne. A human is somebody that feels the loss of another as keenly as if it were itself.

What brings out these emotions? What part of being a human would make us love or hate? There are thousands of facets of the soul and million reasons more why somebody would do something that they do. War or famine, prosperity or abundance.  While a soldier may never know what the rich man feels as he sleeps in his down filled bed, the soldier knows how it feels to love another like a brother of his own blood. The harshness and violence of war where blood is spilled more often than your breath is taken in, is the germination of the seed of gentility and peace that grows in the hearts of all those that worked to create it to end the pain. The man who was deprived will know desperation and fear, maybe even gratitude for what he has in his times of need, while the man who was given all may appreciate what he was given, or not at all.

Through the world we walk, we are constantly fighting our own battles and wars. We are always ousting our own personal demons. We must parry the thrusts of the damned and deranged and hope for the betterment of humankind. Not for the whole of us that are born with some meaningless strands of DNA, of genetic material you cannot even SEE without effort, but for humankind. For all that think and play. For all those that want to see peace and tranquility throughout the conscious whole.

The human condition expresses itself through all aspects of our life. From the first cro-magnon man and woman, to the final human left when everything is done, we will have some way to show ourselves. To leave behind the ideal image we have for ourselves. To leave behind our messages and our thoughts. Through music, religion, poetry, art, sciences, our maths. Everything. A human will know this, a human may not know art or poetry, but a human can solve a math problem or sing a song, write a book, lead an army and even raise a child. What is human, will know it is human by it's self awareness. It knows it is itself. Thus, it is human.

Remember, although rationalization and logic tells us that things like war are detestable, but as humans we have to see it from every angle. We have to walk through the forest of acceptance that grew from those seeds grown from war and learn what it is that we can gain. We can gain the love of life brought from the fear of death. We can learn who we really are from how we bond through our moments of adversity. The real humankind will come together to battle a common cause. Whether we ever find another sentient race in the galaxy or not, whether we ever evolve into something different, we will always know what something human is. It is something that loves like us, something that feels like us. No matter what it is that has broken them to the point where they cannot feel, they will have felt once. We accept them for what they are.

To be human is to accept them for who they are. To be human is not to have the same DNA as us, it is to BE. It is to LIVE for life. That is humanity.

So, I'm sure you've had enough of me for now. Maybe I'll come back sometime and clean up this post, it sure could use a little more coherency. Hopefully I've given you all something to think about.
-Waldon

First things first, HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRITT!

Waldon here, I thought I would start this blog off with a quote by Friedrich Nietzsche, a man who's ideals changed minds across the world with his philosophies. Although I cannot agree with all of his ideas, what kind of person would I be if I simply accepted the ideas as a whole and didn't make my own choices anyway? I think Nietzsche would be disappointed in us if we simply followed his words like sheep.

I've always prided myself on my ideas and my beliefs. I take a stand within myself to create an individual and I'm not ashamed of my ideas. But unlike many others, I don't feel the need to proclaim those idea's to the masses with indignation or frustration towards any that don't see my way, neither do I have a closed mind for any new idea. I can change. I can keep my ideas to myself,  because the rest of you are capable of making up your own minds within the realm of religion, life and fantasy. You don't need me breathing down your neck.

Lately I've been very out of it, and I have to apologize for that to anybody who reads this and knows me personally. Despite what you all think, it's not depression that has me so serious and somber, it is frustration. I'm afraid that I'm not going to get into that, this is a blog about life, not about me being an Emo kid for sympathy. God, I hate Emos. Just grow a pair guys. You and the Metrosexuals.

Yesterday was one of the best days I've had in a very long time. I woke up early, at 6 AM to be precise, and by 9 o clock I had already gotten in contact with Bre, started my driving lesson and been reading for over 2 hours. At around 12 o clock Bre came over. She usually doesn't come that early and I appreciate all of the extra time I spent with her. By 1 30 we had left the house and went to Tim's for her dinner. We went shopping after that for Britt, walking all around and going to several places. I ended up buying Britt a pair of earrings and a Hello Kitty plush doll. That was an. . . odd time I spent in the lineup. I'm a big dude- and I didn't really fit in with the very small mothers with their gaggle of children swarming around us. It was even more odd because of the doll. The mental image is enough to make some people smile.

We got back to my house around 4, we hung out for a little bit, and then Bre went home for supper. Then came quite the pleasing phone call; Bre invited me over to her house for supper and a bonfire. I quickly readied myself and waited for the pick up. Bre and her companions (Her Mother and Britt) swiftly arrived and I placed myself in the vehicle, much to my consternation and Britt's amusement. Have I mentioned how large I am? I'm sure I did. I had to bend my head very far down and my knees were almost touching my chest. In fact, my nose once touched the front seat. I wonder if Bre felt that?

We then proceeded to spend the night with the general merrymaking, although none of us are particularly party people, so it was generally just us sitting down and talking, which is more than alright and something I think people should do WAY more. Britt decorated her own cake, cause she's THAT awesome, and we had a small fire after eating fries and chicken. At around 9 30 I had to take my leave, I could see that Bre and Britt were tired. :P I also didn't want to bother Thomas, so I left by myself and walked home. It was a beautiful night out. I love walking at night, it's quiet, peaceful and everything just feels so clean. The only think I like more than walking at night is walking at night with somebody else. Maybe I'll do a blog on it sometime.

Today consisted of Math and Axe Cop the webcomic. No entertainment value at all, so I'll just leave today out of the blog.

So I guess I'm done. Good night people, and may whatever you worship bless you, or whatever you deny forgive you, in all faiths.
-Waldon

Waldon here. Does anybody else ever forget that they're large? I do it ALL THE TIME. I looked in my mirror when I was getting changed into my bathrobe about half an hour ago and all I could see was the lower half of my ribcage. Then it dawns on me, I'm pretty big. I mean, it doesn't seem like something you could forget!

We had our Remembrance Day ceremony today for our school at the Pentecostal church. I had to read a poem for the ceremony. I also had to tell everybody to rise and stand for the Last Post and the minute of silence. Which sucked because then I had to stay standing on the stage in front of the hundreds of people until that was finished, which was awkward. I had to keep an eye on Mr Gibbs so that he could tell me when the minute was done without seeming to have my head up. It was. . . Odd.

Tomorrow is a day off, which is AWESOME. I think Bre and I are hanging out? I really hope so. I think she said something about Nikita doing something with her sometime soon too. I hope I'm involved in that. I haven't hung out with Nikita in AGES.

Anybody else ever feel like they're always breaking things, or hurting things? Bre and I were just talking about that. I'm always hurting people by accident and I feel horrible about it. I'm a big dude. Most things are rather small compared to me. When I'm walking around I always end up hitting things or people with my shoulders, or when people are punching me or something they'll damage themselves on me, or I'll forget how strong I am and I'll do something too hard and hurt them. That one feels the worst. It really does. I need to start wearing pillows all over me or something.

Almost all night tonight I've been playing a game on ArmorGames.com called Me and My Dinosaur. I spent HOURS playing it. It was awesome. It's the story of a boy who finds a dinosaur egg! He raises it and it becomes his best friend, but nobody else accepts his best pal, Rex. So the boy and Rex run away to find a place where Rex can be in peace. I haven't reached the ending yet, so I'm guessing I'll be working at the game for a while. :P

Anyways, I think I'm done for the night.
-Waldon

Yesterday night, I spent some time reflecting on everything that I've been blessed with in my life. I gave thanks to whatever deity or spirit governs us all. One thing that the oncoming cold of winter made me give particular thanks to, was the blessing of shelter and warmth. So many of us don't realize how lucky we are to be inside and warm, away from the bitter cold outside. Humans as a whole do that. We see winter as a season of beauty and serenity where the snow buries everything under it's pristine white. But what about the animals that live in the snow? They don't have anything to keep them warm besides themselves. The winter to them is just one long period of suffering and hunger. Thinking about this allowed me to reflect and thank everything and everybody that gave me the gift of warmth and food for this cold, spartan, desolate season.

So, of course. This brought to mind the people who don't HAVE a place to live. The homeless people across the country that don't have a home to come to this season. They don't have a loving family to welcome them. As distant as I am from my family, and despite never actually HEARING it, I know that my family loves me. There are people across North America right now that are scrounging for their clothes and food in the cold. I want to help them. Of course, just this evening, my mother handed me a hat with a small symbol on it. The profits from that hat will go to supporting the homeless. I know that it won't make much of a difference, but at least it helps, right?

I've been working on new art styles and concepts to try out lately. One of these is taking an animal and merging myself, in a similar position to the animal, with it. I picked a gorilla screaming. I don't know what to think, because when I laid the image of my face over the gorilla face, I didn't have to change any of the lines. Should I brag about that?

Anyways, I've done my part for this evening. Good night everybody!
-Waldon

So, over the past few days I've been in a very introspective frame of mind. My thoughts are always incoherent and potentially unstable at the best of times, but lately I've been deep into the thought of religion. I've read and reread the new testament, part of the Koran and even the Tao Te Ching (Daodejing) from the Taoist belief. Sadly, the latter text was translated and I'm afraid most it was lost in translation. I found myself relating to points in all three texts. Kindness towards the fellow man, humility and compassion. Offering ourselves to the world, the greater, to see what we can within this short life.

From what I've studied (I can just tell that this blog will probably be controversial) our relationship with nature, as mankind as a whole, has deteriorated to an almost token amount. We've stopped looking around and actually SEEING things. People never stop to look at what is around them anymore. I never see anybody drive slowly because they can. They want to drive fast and hard. Going to the very extent of the speed limit because they can. Get to where they're going as quickly as possible. When has slowing down life and learning to relax without a time frame become so unfashionable? When has "Fun" meant danger and risk? Is it love to let the people we love do that?

We all think of ourselves as important. It's inevitable. We see from behind our own eyes, not another person's.  Our life is a first person view of our own series of emotional paintings. The colors are decided by our feelings and the brush and stroke found with our minds and souls.

There are religions from all over the world preaching about what way is the true way. What way will lead us to the right end. There is nothing that teaches itself to us because of what is right NOW. Heaven. Onefulness with nature. Nirvana. There will always be a reason to act good for a reward. But there is no reason to act good because of the deed itself. To practice Altruism as an art, instead of an institution.

Life is like an art as fine as music. Music lets us show ideas, fancies, or even just our whims. It can carry on for generations. Something we wrote and performed for our own benefit can benefit the world for generations to come. Why says there cannot be some compromise between humility and reward? Altruism and self benefit? I guess there are no absolutes in life.

But I think we can find what we need to understand around us. Deux ex machina. "God in the machine". What is to say that there isn't something guiding us? Punishing us? Blessing us? What is to say there IS something doing this? I have found nothing to prove or disprove it. I hope that someday, somebody will be able to tell me what to believe. What I should follow. Even if it just them. Just one person. I would prefer that. Maybe as the Taoists believe, everything has a soul.

Now, sorry for that rant. But I believe I'll leave this alone for now. This is enough for people to think about anyways, I hope. Maybe I got somebody thinking.

Now, off I go to contemplate the world, offer a prayer to whatever is up there or around me and try to feel the rhythm of things, yeah? I'm sure if I get it wrong, some God will forgive me.

-Waldon