Waldon here and I'm actually feeling horrible. Not physically, although this might end up making me sick to my stomach. Emotionally, I feel like I was brought through the ringer. This is my own fault, actually. I overheard a few people talking and if I was anybody decent I wouldn't have been listening over them anyway. They were talking about life. About how things have gotten so bad that people have become nothing more than "dolls living a facade". Normally I wouldn't even listen to this, it's just your average teenage angst that makes me want to scream with frustration. People aren't that bad. Get over yourself.

But this was. . . Different. After the normal ranting, I heard something else. Another opinion. It didn't sound irrational, it didn't sound like it was somebody venting. It sounded like a choice. You know what I'm talking about, the implications in the voice and tone. The assurance that they're right, at least to themselves.

Whoever it was, made a point that brought up some old, forgotten thoughts in my head that I wish I could forget again. What if people started eliminating everybody deficient? Everybody who doesn't contribute to the gene pool, everybody who has problems? Just euthanize them. Sterilize them. Let nature take it's role. Get rid of the problem.
 
Id be dead within the hour, if that was passed. You might as well take me out behind the shed and shoot me.

Do people really think like that? Am I really seen as just some blight, some scar or wound on society? Am I just some quaint idea the rest of the world decided would be fun to keep going? Would the world be better to the rest of you, without me?

I hate this. I don't need this kind of doubt now. Aside from the girl problems I'm having, aside from the jealousy and resentment I feel every day, now I have to deal with feeling like some broken toy being played with by children mimicking God?

Whatever. I don't care. I'll go on with whatever I was doing. Maybe I'll go curl up somewhere and feel sorry for myself some more. I need to grow a pair or something, really.

Sorry for the depressing post guys, but I don't think telling my parents would benefit me in any way whatsoever, nor would making my friends all depressed help, so I've got to rant somewhere. Thanks for reading this, whomever does, I like to think at least one person hears my view on this whole travesty. Good night everybody, and I hope you all sleep well.
-Waldon

Trust me, I won’t explode for no good reason. Nan and Pop came home last night. That’s why I didn’t write the blog. I’m sorry for that, but my excitement kind of overpowers the sorriness I feel. Is sorriness even a word?! I don’t even know! Anywho. Nan and Pop and their dog, Chum, are home now! They got in around 6 last night. We were all SO pumped. The road was awful, and they were traveling all day, but they made it in safe and sound, thank goodness. We’re all glad to see them home. I don’t have words to express this feeling of elation. (^^)

Presently, I’m talking to Junior, Daniel, and Dad on MSN. I have to call Dad! I haven’t actually talked to him since Sunday *uber sad face!*. I never know when is a good time to call. SO! I’m just going to call when I get out of school (well, around 4:30 ish) tomorrow and call and call and call until I get an answer. I love Dad so much. <3

So, last night, Nan and Pop got home. They came down here for a bit. When they left, I went to Ryan’s to work on our English project. We got some done, but nothing much. We’re getting together again tomorrow night, so we’ll really get started then. I got home late, and then I was too tired to do anything else. I’ve been sleeping like crap lately.. It might be because of stress? I hope it passes. I can’t handle this anymore. (O_O)

Today, I was exhausted. I didn’t realize that I had forgotten to write the blog last night until about 8 o’clock this morning! Immediately, I text Junior to tell him that I was sorry. He told me it was okay (naturally. He’s NEVER been mad at me) and then told me that he’d be late for school. He had his road test. A GREAT BIG CONGRATULATIONS TO HIM BECAUSE HE GOT HIS LICENCE. Woot! I’m so proud of him! School was okay. Nothing major went on. Apparently, we have a Christmas concert tomorrow night. Who knew? Not I. Daniel and Vlad are singing in it. I don’t know who else is. It’s the school choir/vocal ensemble/band thing. I don’t think I’ll be able to go, even though I want to. Ryan and I will be working on our project tomorrow, so I won’t be able to go. Oh well. I’ll cheer for them spiritually.

After school, I had tutoring and Daniel had to do the recycling, so he brought me to Nan and Pop’s afterward. I was SO pumped. I thanked him for the ride and would have run to the door if there wasn’t any black ice, haha. Pop and Chum greeted me at the door, and then I went into the computer room and hung out with Nan. Pop showed me some pictures on his camera, and I cuddled Chum a bit too. When suppertime rolled around, none of us knew what to eat! Nan was talking to Uncle Ja on the phone, and he said sausages and fries/potatoes. SO! We had moose sausages (yum! It was the first time I’d ever had moose!) and homemade fries done in the over, and peas, and coleslaw. It was delicious! Then Nan and Pop’s friends Lorne and Julie came over. I like those two. :)

Then Nan brought me home. I got into a fit of hiccups earlier and every time I hiccuped, I couldn’t type. Go me. It was great. I would have looked crazy if someone had seen me!

I guess that’s it for me tonight.. Sorry about my thoughts being everywhere, haha. Good night all!

- Bre :)

Waldon here, and today has finally lived up to my expectations.

Today was the second meeting, I believe, of the wrestling team. It was the first opportunity I had to go to a meeting. In all due regard, it was FUN. I had three partners over the course of the evening. Pat, Brandon and Dusty. Pat is almost 300 pounds, Brandon 260, and Dusty is 180. I'm 215 pounds. So you can tell I had an interesting time adjusting.

My knee is almost healed, or as healed as it's going to get, and it definitely wouldn't have worked out if it still hurt me like it did a week ago.

I actually don't know the name of the man that is teaching us, I just called him "Coach". He did something that I've never before had happen. He overpowered me without even TRYING. We were doing a move called "The Gut Wrencher", and yes- it IS just as unpleasant as it sounds, where you are next to a person on the floor with your arms pinning their arm in and squeezing them as hard as you can around the lowest rib (the floating rib) and rolling with them. Basically a horizontal Bear Hug making their elbow crush their own ribs.

After a minute or so of me intensive squeezing, Coach looked at me and said; "Is that all?"

My arms are strong enough to break ribs. I've taken a wire mesh cage and bent it, I've had separate people on my two arms and used them as weights. My arm's aren't weak. This guy is just insane.

Also, he has a completely rockin' stache. I think it could dominate a small nation with just it's awesome.

Besides this, I didn't really do much today. I got to spend lunch today with Bre again. :) I love going to the math help centre with her. Wrestling really dominated the whole "event" factor. So, I guess I'll head on out from here. Besides, I already lost a good portion of this post from a bad connection. I hate bad connections. They make me angry.

You wouldn't like me when I'm angry.

WALDON SMASH!

OHMIGOODNESS, I am SO sorry to whomsoever reads this. I haven’t written the blog since the 30th of November. My sincerest apologies! Junior has been amazing and has been writing mine for me, on top of what he has to do. God bless you, good sir. He’s been such a help!

I’ve been so busy lately. Our research paper was due on Friday, so I was TRYING to write that all last week. I couldn’t make any headway with it until Thursday! Argh. We got a Math assignment on Thursday morning while I was out, and it’s due tomorrow, so I had to do that. I have like, three (or four?) tests/quizzes this week. Our Chem assignment (that I’m proud to say that I only have ONE question left on) is due Friday. My A Separate Peace assignment is due next Friday. Oh well. I’ll get it all done. That doesn’t mean that I won’t stress about it, but I’ll get it done.

Yesterday afternoon, Daniel and I went Christmas shopping for our teacher. We picked up some ribbon for Mom, too. It. Was. A. Blast.

Last night I had to work again. It was crazy. At one point, a drunk guy came up, grabbed the cart we were using, and started dancing with it. What do you SAY to that? I was laughing so hard that I could hardly ask for it back. He wouldn’t stop! THEN, another guy came by and said to us, "Oh, we’re going to help you girls" and started to clear the tables. Well then. We weren’t complaining. Chivalrous drunks? Sure! Anywho, we finished up at around 11. I brought home Natasha, the other girl, then went to Mom’s right quick. I dropped off a bit of food, haha. Then! I went back to Dad’s house. I stayed there last night. Dad and I watched a movie for a bit, then went for a quick drive to get some gas. It was awesome!

Then, I played this AWESOME game called Patrician IV. Mandy had it in German a few years ago, and I loved playing it. Unfortunately, the computer decided to stop playing it, so we have been without it for a long time. Last month, Mandy ordered the new version of it in English so that we could all understand it better. At first, I wished it was in German again. Mind you, I can’t read, speak, or write it. But man, I could play that game. The ultimate objective is to become a seasoned merchant. You have to travel all around (certain places) in Europe and gain respect in each town. The further along you are, the better your reputation, therefore the better merchant you will be. You will eventually be able to expand your warehouses to other towns and become mayor of your own. I LOVE that game. Play it.

Now.

Oh, my apologies to Junior, too. He was all worried about me because I hadn’t contacted him all night. I messaged him on MSN before I went to bed so that he wouldn’t hyperventilate. :P

Today, Dad, Mandy, and I all took a drive out to where Dad is working now. It was great! Minus the fact that I had to wake up shortly before 8... When I went to bed at 1:30. Ack. I did homework this afternoon. Again. I went over to Junior’s on Friday night and we did our Math assignment. It was great! We also took Gunner out for a walk. I love that dog. (^^)

THEN, tonight we went to the Northern Tour show. It was wonderful! They had a comedian (don’t remember his name..) and the band the Paper Lions (EXCELLENT, EXCELLENT, EXCELLENT. Look them up, if you can!) and Sass Jordan. Loud, but amazing.

And that’s it for me! I’m helping Ryan with his Math now, so I need to focus my attention on him. And talk to Junior... Good night!

- Bre :)

Waldon here again and I haven't heard from Bre tonight, I hope she's alright. It's almost midnight and there's no blog post up from her, so I'm a little worried. Okay, I'm more than a little worried, but. . . I haven't talked to her since almost noon today. I feel like there's something important missing that should be with me. I hate this feeling. I always follow my gut instinct and this just feels BAD. So I'm going to try and get a hold of her in the morning.

We're lacking snow. It's the first week of December and we don't even have a foot of snow. I can't even drive a skidoo outside. I'm still wearing a fall jacket and green grass is still growing on some lawns. Please, whatever god is out there, send us a little snow. Just two years ago I was driving my skidoo around town in three and a half feet of snow by the middle of November. Why can't we get THAT again? I want to go get my Christmas Tree.

Today I went to Tim's. And that's just about it. I walked down to meet my friend Laura and then we went to Tim's. From 2 o clock to almost 4. During that, Scottie and Robyn met up with us, and we journeyed to my house for a while, ate some pizza and played video games until just about half an hour ago. It was a good night.

One of said video games was Assassin's Creed II. Anybody who's played that game will immediately understand what I'm talking about when I say those guards are AWESOME. That circle formation? Simply terrifying.

Played CoD Black Ops for a while, but our connection is horrible here. I'm always getting disconnected or interrupted. So we stopped that and as I said just above, started gaming Assassins Creed II.

Not a bad night on the whole. Still anxious though. Since I've got nothing to talk about, really. I think I'm going to go to bed. Good night to the maybe 5 people who actually READ this.
-Waldon

Waldon here again tonight guys, and for whosoever reading this, I'm sorry. I've really got nothing good to talk about. Mostly just philosophy and such. I can't get into the details of life like Bre. Which is what most of you want to hear ANYWAY. So, my salutations if you've stuck with me this far.

I've almost completely abandoned my supposed "style" several days ago now. I've become a sort of hybrid of styles now. As opposed to what I WAS doing ("Little Big Eyed People", if any of you remember) I now use elements of North American cartoon, some of the anime-esque styles from Japan, with a good dose of my own originality in there as well.

Just several minutes ago I finished a sketch of a guy wearing some sort of post apocalyptic armor walking out of a smoke filled pit. I was shaking the whole time, and I think that added to the effect. It seemed to help the shakiness when I sketched.Fantasy fascinates me, as well as post-apocalyptica. I'll be honest, my fascination probably stems with some morbid subconscious desire to live like that. I wouldn't last after an apocalypse. Diabetes kind of makes you vulnerable.  As well as all the other stuff. But Diabetes mostly. :P

Tonight Bre came over and helped with my math. Math is my Achilles heel. I've made it my life's goal to become useful to people before I kick the bucket. But I'm afraid that math will never be part of that usefulness. I mean, why would I bother using the quadratic equation to find the trajectory of a football thrown with 100 joules of energy to see where it lands, when I could just DO IT?

Thank you SO much Bre, ARoC would have had me stumped all night without you around to explain it to me. I'm sorry for being so dense, but alas, I'm afraid that it's the curse of being so tank. There's a drawback to being large you know- and that is stupidity.

Or at least, that's what I'm TOLD anyway. You wouldn't believe how many times I've been told that a guy as large as me will never be as smart as people who spend their time studying instead of working out. Despite evidence to the contrary. And my IQ. And that exercise actually increases mental output. Oh well. A big guy like me wouldn't know, would I?

Fun fact, I've had 6 "jobs". Every single one of them I was hired on the spot for my size. In fact, my employer for the last 2 years didn't know I was an honors student or that I could speak french or converse about biology on a university level. Gratifying.

Well, rant over, I suppose.

Good night everybody!
-Waldon

Waldon here, I'm filling in for Bre tonight, VERY LATE tonight, and the title is exactly what it sounds like. I have this twitch in my arm that makes me tense up all of a sudden, its quite scary when I'm not expecting anything at all. So, when I've got my head down on my arms for a rest or something in class, sometimes I'll end up punching myself square in the mouth. I'm a big guy, so it's kind of painful.

I don't know if I'll be able to write very much tonight, I've been working on an English paper all night, so I'm kind of worded out. Speaking of which, don't you hate it when you're writing something and JUST when you get into the writing, you realize you're already more words over the limit than you're allowed to be? Like, I'm texting somebody and all of a sudden I'm into my third text or something. It sucks. I think Mr Crane will probably get mental whiplash from reading my paper. It starts slow, speeds up. . . and then stops abruptly.

In school today, our Improv group was called up in front of the school to perform for a pep rally. Now, its not a bad thing, but we weren't particularly funny today. At the pep rally, we had a group of people who suffer from dwarfism who play basketball show up and talk to us about bullying. I have a simple solution to bullying. If I find anybody beating up somebody small and defenseless, or teasing somebody at all, I will beat them to a snot, for a lack of a better way to describe it.

I'm not joking. I've been bullied. It's not cool.

Bre and I had our Grad Pictures taken tonight, and of course it goes without saying that Bre was radiant. . . and I almost forgot to wear the gown. Contrast, yeah? I think I look like a thug when I wear a dress shirt and tie. Like, you should call me Mungo, pat my head and tell me to make somebody "Swim with the fishes."

Now, I'm out of resolve to write anymore, so without further adieu,
Good night everybody!
-Waldon

Waldon here, and I'm suffering from writers block again. That is the most irritating thing I can think of. Every night I DON'T have the blog, I can write a thousand words, easy.

So, this morning Bre picked me up. :D It's the first time I've ever had somebody pick me up for school! I have to say I was kind of excited. We got to school and got inside and all that jazz. Nothing too exciting. First period this morning I had art. Art is possibly one of my favorite classes. After art I had skilled trades. We set up some drywall and got everything ready for nailing and such next day. All kinds of fun.

Gah. My fingers are really cold. Like, they're FREEZING.

After school today I was pretty excited. I thought I was going to get to go to my first practice on the school wrestling team, it turns out that it was canceled. So instead I got to drive around with Bre for an hour or so while she did errands. :) That was better than wrestling could possibly have been, I just want to sayI love just being with people. Whenever I'm not, I get depressed and angry. I don't like being depressed and angry. I always end up hurting somebody. I don't like hurting people.

I've recently started making skeletons before drawing people, and it's improved my art (at least to my eyes) by a hundredfold. I like how it looks SLIGHTLY more realistic. It's not at the level of Micheal Whelan or Diego Riviera, but at least you can tell it's a person. :P In fact, I just finished sketching a conversation between Bre and I in the math help center today, and I love how the characters can actually be seen in different positions. You couldn't see that with my other stuff. It was all about the dutch angles and stuff. Or about a center image.

Anyways, I'm off for the night. . . and to a very special person out there, you know who you are, I hope you feel better soon. That probably doesn't mean much to you, but I like to think I helped. Good night all!
-Waldon